Hope in Tragedy

Ken Reddig and Linda Driedger Eden Foundation with Monique Lépine

People at both the Friday evening and Saturday events of Eden Foundation’s dessert nights heard a dark but inspiring story from Monique Lepine. Monique is the mother of Marc Lepine, who became nationally known as the Polytechnic killer in 1989. After 17 years of silence she broke her silence and now speaks of the tragedy restoration she has experienced in her life.

She began her story with December 6, 1989 when she heard on radio that a man had killed 14 women at the Polytechnique College in Montreal. It was not until a day later she learned that it was her son who was the killer. She told of how she could not believe what had happened and how devastated she felt. Neither the police or journalists showed sympathy for her. To get away from Journalists she stayed at her pastors home and later simply avoided the public as much as possible to stay our of the way of the press.

Meanwhile she asked that eternal question, “Why?” She thought of her guilt for her divorce from a husband who beat her and her son. She then had to become a strong single mother who worked long hours as a nurse. At the same time she knew she could not attend to her children like she felt she should have. When her daughter died from an overdose of drugs, her guilt and shame worsened.

Fortunately before this all happened she had become a Christian. It was her faith in God that she clung too—often very weakly. But it kept her going. Meanwhile she had the support and compassion of  fellow workers and friends. That kept her going and for weeks and months she wept and prayed.

One difficult thing she discovered was that while there was financial and counseling support for the victims, there was nothing provided for the family of the perpetrator. The criminal code simply did not see her as a victim.

Among the messages of support she received one was from Gil Remillard who was Minister of Justice at the time. “Don’t feel guilty,” he told her. And part of her healing was to make the distinction between her responsibility and that of her children. A very difficult thing for her to do.

She noted how she went to church but often was very depressed. One evening in Church she felt she was dying of sadness. She leaned against the person next to her and told her, “If I fall down, let me lie there on the floor”. She had no desire to live. Her heart was beating irregularly. And then she heard the Lord’s voice speaking to her. “Who was it that gave you life?” She then said, “You Lord.” And then she felt as if it was the Lord asking her whether she wanted to live or die. And she said, “Lord, if I live, you are the one who has to open all the doors and has to give meaning to my life. You have to give me another chance.”

And that is what happened. She began speaking to women’s groups, and gave her testimony in other groups, churches and jails.

Today Ms. Lepine spreads her message around North America and even into Europe. She notes that if you have pain and are suffering, or if you have deep secrets that have affected you, you need to talk about them and not keep them to yourself. It is also very important that you find someone you know and trust that you can confide in. But most important she notes, “You need to find the courage to cry out to the Lord.”

She closed the events by noting that her heart had been broken and now it has been healed. She has been comforted and restored. No matter what the circumstance her message is for people to be strong on the journey. And today it is her mission to convey that message to all who are hurting.  

Eden Foundation News Release