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There is no single factor that causes eating disorders among young people and there is no one solution. But we adults can address some of the elements that contribute to the problem. Many young people are driven by standards created by a society that allows its children to be socialized by television, the Internet, and their peers, instead of by caring and mentoring adults. Some adults who do care and are involved with young people see kids as helpless and in need of protection from the risk of failure or being hurt.

            To relieve the competitive pressure that’s so prevalent in the culture at large and learned by our children at an early age, we want to dispute the idea that there is only one way to success in the world, that it’s all about which university you go to, how much you money you make or what car you drive.

            We can acknowledge the impossibility of perfection. The need to be perfect drives many young women, beginning as early as age eleven. Talk with your young people about the limiting nature of the self-preoccupation that defines perfectionists and how perfectionism is an ultimately self-defeating strategy.

            Encourage young people over whom you have influence to experiment with a broad range of activities. Debrief with them about what they gained from their experiences and what they might do differently another time. Allow them to fail and acknowledge that they may occasionally get hurt. Help them define the willingness to attempt as success.